Managing Your Emotions…Just Like Riding a Bike

Do you remember learning how to ride a bike? I remember it like it was yesterday. I have a vivid memory of being in the driveway that ran behind our stretch of row homes in Philly. Over forty years later, the imagery is all there. The feeling is still fresh. Along with the lesson I learned that day.

I was learning to ride on a beat up black Huffy that was handed down from one of my older brothers. I’d get up on the seat and my Dad would hold onto the back to steady the bike.  As I started peddling and moving down the drive, he’d run alongside of me, holding onto the bike the entire way.

But on one particular run, I remember going faster than I’d ever gone on that bike before and having this feeling of pure joy at how great it felt that we got that far and I was keeping my balance.

I turned my head to show my Dad the look of excitement that blanketed my face. But imagine my shock when I saw nothing but air. I quickly realized that if he wanted to see the look on my face, he’d better have his glasses on.  Because he was twenty yards away back at where we started.

He pulled the ol’ rope-a-dope. The switcharoo. The ol’ “Now you see me. Now you don’t.” He did what all parents do. He got me started. Helped me get my balance.  Helped me build up my confidence.  Then he sent me out to face the world on my own. He let go!

I remember the smile on his face, his fists in the air in celebration, and his cheering I was doing it! I was riding a bike all on my own!

That’s when the feeling of dread quickly replaced my excitement.

“Oh my God, I’m all on my own!”

And down I went!

That bike hit the ground faster than you can say “scraped knee”. There were tears. There was anger.

But then there was realization that I had just learned to ride a bike. My life would be forever changed. I would never NOT know how to ride a bike again.

Within minutes I was back up and cruising around with no help.  I allowed myself to believe that I could do this.  Soon, it was like there was never a time when I didn’t know how to do this.

As a child of the 80’s, I rode my bike a LOT. I also fell off of it a lot!  I hit a lot of unexpected bumps in the road that threw me from my seat. But I got back up. I cleaned myself off, and I got back on the bike and finished the ride. Sometimes maybe I had a big enough cut to warrant heading home for some bandages.  But then I was back on my bike and out riding again.

Managing Your Emotions Moves You Forward!

The same logic applies to life and emotions.  We spend our lives trying to train our brain to be stronger than our emotions.  Some of us are better than others.  For some it comes naturally (and for some TOO  naturally).

For others though they have to work very, very hard at it and many times unsuccessfully. But that doesn’t mean we stop trying.  And once you learn how to do it…you will ALWAYS know how to do it!

In life we’re going to hit a lot of unexpected bumps in the road, and we’re going to be thrown from our seat.  But we can’t let ourselves stay down on the ground and feel sorry for ourselves.

Life goes on and so must we.

We need to get back up, clean ourselves off, get back on that emotional bike and finish the ride!  You need to take charge!

It can be tough.  I know.  Some falls are worse than others. Some falls leave you worse than bruised.  They leave you battered and broken and you feel like you can barely stand, much less move forward.  And sometimes you’ll need help to heal those wounds.

But staying down on the ground only serves to let the world that’s passing you by kick dirt on you.  You end up filthy and your wounds get infected.  Your LIFE gets infected by the negative feelings.

Ok Great…Manage My Emotions.  But How?

The list of ways to manage your emotions and your stress is long, and you’ve probably read it a thousand times. But, read that list as many times as you need to.  It’s that important.

Some of my go-to coping mechanisms are:

• Exercise
• Playing or Listening to Music (Scream out some song lyrics while driving)
• Writing/Journaling (Get your feelings out.  Release them!)
• Find someone to talk to (Saying it out loud is sometimes all that’s needed to help you move past something)

If you want to spend a little time on the ground to gather yourself, go right ahead. But, for all that is good in this world, make a promise to yourself to get up and get back on your emotional bike.  Don’t let the negativity wash over you.  You need the positive energy that you have in reserve to get you back on track.

You are on a journey. It’s yours and only yours. You can get help along the way. But it’s your job to make the decision to move forward towards your destination…wherever that may be.  And there really is no telling where that is. But that’s the beauty of the emotional ride that you’re taking.

It’s the journey that’s important, not the destination. To take that journey, you’ll need to get up on that bike and start peddling. It’ll help you get there a lot faster, that’s for sure.

Did you enjoy this article?  Don’t miss out on the next one!  Sign Up for the Two R’s / Two F’s Newsletter and get updates sent right to your inbox.

Check me out on YouTube too!